Authenticity, Compassion, Connection, Courage, Depression, goals, Inner Freedom, Perfectionism, Recovery, relationships, Shame, spiritual, True Self, Vulnerability

Recovering Perfectionist

Yes. It is true! I am a recovering perfectionist. I didn’t know for a long time what was creating incredible discomfort inside of myself. It was shame. A sense of feeling defective, bad and wrong. The shame that fuels perfectionism is overwhelmingly stressful and toxic to our whole being. This stress creates havoc on all levels physically, emotionally, mentally, financially, relationally and spiritually. Shame tells us we are bad. Guilt tells us we have done something bad or wrong and we can make amends. Shame is destructive and pervasive in our homes, work environments, media and in our culture.

In order to begin healing from perfectionism we need to address shame. Shame thrives in judgment and secrecy. It is important to dissolve shame storms with the support of our friends. As we share our experiences of shame we begin to heal in the openness of allowing ourselves to be human. As human beings we all make mistakes and have many opportunities for growth and learning. We are all worthy of love and respect, gentleness and kindness. We are all challenged with life and various circumstances. Our human-ness is our common bond. We all suffer from shame. Shame and blame are conditioned patterns and ways of being inside ourselves and with others until we commit to healing the shame that binds us. Whenever we are coming from of place of against-ness it is usually within the energy field of shame. “You are doing it wrong.” “Who do you think you are?” “I’m right, you’re wrong.”etc.

Shame fuels depression, eating disorders, anxiety disorders, addictions, perfectionism, gambling, compulsive work and OCD. It is a pervasive feeling of not good enough. As a recovering perfectionist it is important to allow ourselves to make mistakes. We learn to be gentle with ourselves. We allow ourselves to be flawed, human and imperfect.

Everyday it is a practice of being honest, vulnerable and genuine. It is a courageous act to be vulnerable. It is also very rewarding. Vulnerability and authenticity creates connection. I encourage you to try vulnerability with those you feel safe. Take baby steps and tell the truth. Share your inner most experience with someone you trust. Shame dissipates when shared with others. Most importantly be compassionate with yourself and others. We are all doing our best. We do better when we know better.

Remember you are worthy of love no matter what. Love does not depend on being perfect. Love is your inherent birthright. Spiritually speaking you are LOVE. The Universal impulse is that of LOVE. You are LOVE.

If you are ready to move beyond shame into your AWESOMENESS go to to schedule your complimentary breakthrough session so that you can live more fearlessly, aligned with your True Self, experiencing greater health, wealth and happiness. You will be glad you did!!

Compassion, Connection, Inner Freedom, Self Forgiveness, True Self

Compassionate Self Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a challenging yet profoundly important path to learn and maneuver. We are aware of how important it is to not only forgive others but to forgive ourselves. Anger, resentment, judgment, feelings of betrayal and bitterness affects our health in ways that we do not consciously comprehend. The delusion is that we can get away with these feelings of against-ness without consequences. The truth is every time we judge ourselves or others we are inflicting wounds on our psyche.

Our inherent nature is unconditional loving. That is who and what we are at the core of our True Self. When we condemn or hold a position of self righteousness, we are tearing flesh, so to speak. We are hurting ourselves. At the core of our being we are engaging in fragmentation and splitting off from our inherent Loving Presence by misinterpreting ourselves and others as other than who are, Spiritual beings using this human experience to learn greater SELF AWARENESS, transforming limiting beliefs and releasing anything unlike loving.

When we are feeling hurt by perceiving we are being judged by others we are also wounding ourselves. We are agreeing with the judgment on some level. We know this by our reaction of hurt or anger. As we grow more secure and confident inside of ourselves any judgment from others simply fall away. It is your barometer of progression. If you know the truth of who you are, as HU-man, reactions to others will be minimal. You will find yourself living in greater peace which manifests as greater health, physically, emotionally, mentally, financially and interpersonally.

After my divorce I was feeling so disillusioned, disappointed, betrayed, lied to and so very hurt that my mind and emotions were full of judgments. It took a great deal of effort, on a daily basis, to work with and release my sense of self righteousness and feeling like a victim. Even though I was victimized by his behaviors there came a time to move forward, to release the negativity, and to take back my power and my life. I am grateful to the various resources available to me in order to heal my mind, body, emotions, finances, and heart. Today I am stronger, wiser, more compassionate and healthier because I chose inner freedom through compassionate self forgiveness.

When we go through major trauma it is wise to give ourselves plenty of time and space to heal. There is so much turmoil and disorganization that happens as the result of major life changes. It is as if we need time in the recovery room after a major surgery. The healing process is unique and individualized. It is important to give space and time to feeling all of the emotions and processing all of the various events leading up to and after the life altering circumstance. We can seek out various resources such as grief support groups, counseling, coaching and spiritual communities that may be very supportive during these times of loss and trauma.

The more we can forgive ourselves and others the more inner freedom and joy we experience. Our health thrives. Our relationships flourish. Our finances blossom. Our joy returns with more potency and aliveness. Compassionate self forgiveness is a process of recovery and healing. Give yourself the gift of healing. Schedule your complimentary breakthrough session if you are ready to take back your power and your life!